Elmhurst Satirist Suffers From Cancer
ELMHURST, IL – Dave Noble’s satire is all about Elmhurst.
Just recently, he wrote about the local “Hate Rate.” For the record, it does not exist.
Noble, who is known on Elmhurst’s restaurant and bar scene, is suffering from cancer, his sister confirmed Tuesday.
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A fundraiser is being held for Noble, a 1986 graduate of York High School, from 4 p.m. to 8 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 16, at The Club Shot & Beer, 113 N. Addison Ave. A minimum donation of $75 is requested to attend the event honoring Noble.
The event will include an open bar and food from Pints sports bar, Golden Boy restaurant and Armand’s Pizzeria.
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According to the event announcement, Noble was recently diagnosed with terminal Stage 4 cancer.
“Dave has always been a loyal and honest friend to many,” the announcement said.
Patch contacted Noble’s sister, Susan Pelafas, who said her brother is well known for his writing ability.
Noble is the writer behind the Elmhurst Funion, starting in January 2016. It is the local version of The Onion, a national satirical publication.
Noble’s most recent Funion piece was on Oct. 26, titled, “Research Study Shows Elmhurst Residents Now Hate Everything About Elmhurst.” He referred to a fictional study by Elmhurst University.
“Using data gathered from interviews, focus groups, and a survey of semi-intoxicated attendees exiting last month’s Rock the Block event, the research study shows an ‘Elmhurst Hate Rate’ of 84% among current residents that has steadily increased since around the time that the city permanently cancelled ‘Cool Cars Under the Stars,'” Nobel wrote.
In March, Noble reported on Mayor Scott Levin’s dyeing of Salt Creek’s water to “emerald green” in honor of the annual St. Patrick’s Day parade. In Noble’s account, Levin piloted a small motorboat to spread the dye.
But Noble assured readers the creek was expected to return to its “natural murky-brown color” by the next day.
In another story, he listed the 10 biggest mistakes made by parade-goers.
One of them: “Forgetting If You Parked Five Blocks East Or Five Blocks West Of Spring Rd.: A devastating mistake if you guess wrong. Consider leaving a trail of urine between your vehicle and the parade so that you can find your way back to the car by scent.”
In March 2023, Noble had fun with the annual vehicle stickers that the city requires.
He reported, “The fine for not having a current sticker will triple this year, and the Elmhurst Police Department issued a statement this morning reminding residents to leave their garage doors open during the first week of May so officers can verify that all vehicles have a current sticker.”
Relax, it’s all satire.
Here is the announcement for the fundraiser honoring Dave Noble:
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